THE 4C HAIR CHRONICLES: AUSSIE MOIST 3 MINUTE MIRACLE MOISTURE DEEP CONDITIONER

My mother had a hard time finding suitable products for her Afro after moving to the UK in the 70’s. Apart from Blue Magic and Dax pressing oils, her limited options included Sunsilk shampoo, Revlon conditioner, and her trusty hot comb. Fascinated by the long flowing manes blonde models flaunted in TV commercials, Mum soon had every other shampoo brand lined up in our bathroom, and expected each one to keep their tangle-free promise as seen on TV, but ended up disappointed time after time.

As a kid I wasn’t allowed to have my hair relaxed, and learned to accept wearing ‘threads’ to a predominately white school where a blonde bully constantly mocked the “worms and spiders” in my hair. As previously mentioned in a previous post from 2013, I couldn’t understand why I wore worms and spiders as opposed to threads despite using the same products as my friends. Mum would wash, condition, and style my hair every Sunday using her old frenemy Sunsilk and that dreaded hot comb. Complete agony! After she discovered Ultra Sheen grooming grew less painful, but she continued to seek the ultimate in black haircare. A magic potion guaranteed to give me ‘good hair’ – good luck with that.

As an adult I reverted to Mum’s old habits, curious to discover the secret benefits of shampoos and conditioners specifically formulated for African hair. Did my curious quest yield positive results? Your guess is as good as mine. I came to a final conclusion after countless trials – black products for black people, even if you continue to channel Don King. This unwritten hair rule I’ve followed for many years. Imagine my surprise when I saw several 4C YouTubers promoting a well-known brand from Australia targeted at white women. How was this possible? I had to try this product after hearing the positive reviews, but does this macadamia-enriched miracle-worker live up to the hype?

First impression? Interesting pump dispenser bottle. Pleasant scent. 3 minutes? All I have to do to have achieve tangle-free hair is leave this Aussie Moist 3 Minute Miracle in my hair for three minutes? A normal deep conditioning treatment on my long-suffering hair took 15 minutes to 3 hours depending on which method I use, but 3 minutes? I couldn’t wait to try this product and run my manicure through the results.

After shampooing with my usual ORS shampoo, I poured a generous amount into my palm and applied to a section of my hair, relishing the inviting scent. The thick conditioner slipped on pretty well but could have been better. After combing the product through I covered my hair and waited 15 minutes. Yes, 15. The bottle clearly recommends 3, but with my 4C hair I couldn’t take that chance. I rinsed off under the shower and used my natural hair comb. This is where I experienced Aussie Moist’s effectiveness. My hair hadn’t felt that soft since I joined Team Natural nearly five years ago. Unbelievable. Why hadn’t anyone told me about this earlier? Why have I never seen it at my local salon?

Unfortunately my joy was short-lived. I twisted my hair and let it dry naturally, and yes, I applied a leave-in conditioner cream doubling as a setting agent. The results? Dry twist-outs, despite the added moisture. No more tangling, but my hair felt brittle. The next day my short-lived softness returned to the 4C texture I’d fought hard to avoid, once again leaving me frustrated. My hair never learns, and neither do I.

I nearly threw away whatever remained of the deceitful concoction-I refuse to have a shampoo display in my bathroom as my mother did-but judging by other reviews I’ve read, I must have missed a few steps. Maybe I could use Aussie Miracle conditioner with my bonnet dryer when my protective cornrows come down and see what happens. Here’s hoping.

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